This Morning

A full five hours yesterday I braced myself. A full five and for the first time in living history, definitely anyway since I've become a mother, I watched This Morning on tv.

This Morning! Even as a student I never put my feet up to that. Something seriously going wrong methought.

Paralysed I was. I've been told that some people have been housed by calling the council everyday. Every day until the council are so fecking fed up they actually house the person. Should I try that?

This won't happen with me. The housing division has something truly against me and any effort I make is not worth the effort in the first place and this would only result in a monumental high telephone bill.

So there was whatsisname and whatsername chatting on the telly while I sat on the sofa looking at the carnage which is paper and folders and odd socks and stuff my son has made strewn over the floor, and the number I should call written bold on the laptop.

Five hours, five hours later I called, going round the proverbial houses before I was put through to the flipping impotent homeless households division.

I asked them if they wanted me to follow Jennyfer Spencer into the grave.

Wouldn't it be funny.. wouldn't it be fecking hilarious.. if I died. It might make the news, all my appeals for help and there would the council be, making all its flipping excuses "oh we did no wrong, oh we did no wrong" and then possibly the bigger story that there were two known deaths due to housing now.

Sorry to admit I plunged into a pit of darkness afterwards. I know I should call again but I don't want to waste another five hours mustering up the will.

Jennyfer Spencer ran out of will. She didn't make the news. Why not? Why didn't she? She left a flipping note, attributed her death to housing policy.

I shall call again, even though it's as pointless as the points they issue us.

Telly's off. There's no This Morning for me this morning. It's a major distraction, which is cool, but doesn't actually achieve anything because I am actually nothing but a corpse with a pulse.

Aaargh, I've never been this bad before, totally and utterly incapable. Well not consciously anyway.

Snap out of it, snap out of it but Do Not Break.

Oh I don't know if I'll bother calling afterall...