Go Write!!!

At my son's school this morning, a literacy workshop for parents and children: "Go, Write!"
Really interesting, informative, great. How they encourage these kids to build their vocabulary and write creative sentences, exemplary.

I get home and there's the ASOS people telling me I haven't sent back the questionnaire about my mental health and my benefits may be affected if I don't return it by next Friday. Go WRITE...

I know you won't believe me but I can't do it.

Yes, yes, I know I've written about four posts this morning and I write articles and letters but I can't write what they are asking me to write.

They are asking me to write an essay describing my illness.

I can write "I feel suicidal" but they won't give a shit about that. Who gives a shit about that? Besides, that's not an essay, it's a sentence. "I had a mental breakdown, I need time to heal so it doesn't happen again" won't wash with them either.

My doctor told me to get Citizen's Advice to help me with it after her colleague told me I'd be found fit for work.

I'm actually ashamed to say I can't do it. Ashamed I can't write the essays. Ashamed to go to Citizen's Advice and say 'help me'.

There are about three essays to write, the thought of which is totally depressing.

Fuck.

I just thought I'd tell you because I am somebody who can read and write so imagine how hard again it must be for someone who can't.

"Go Write!" kids.

I hope you don't find yourself where I am when you grow up.