Too depressed to write today

It's too much. Too much too much too much

I shouldn't read, even good articles like George Monbiot's Making Democracy Safe for Business:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/jan/09/bankers-protesters-squatters-cameron

or one's delivering avoidable news like this one:
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/top-stories/2012/01/10/child-poverty-gap-widening-between-tory-areas-and-the-inner-cities-115875-23692250/

or the articulation that the attack is on all sides and only the Lords can save us: http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2012/jan/10/welfare-reform-lords-blows-poor-disabled?CMP=twt_gu

Then tomorrow Single Mother's Self Defence are protesting the welfare reform bill outside parliament. I want to go. I so want to go:

Women are coming to us very distressed about the Welfare Reform Bill and how it will affect them. They are terrified by total insecurity -- from the cuts to housing benefit and the benefit cap, to impossible jobseeking, work and childcare conditions, under the threat of sanctions applied to unwaged and low earner alike. They fear their benefits will be cut off and they and their families will be forced into unbearably overcrowded homes, or they will be made homeless, destitute and even end up on the street.

Women, who have the first responsibility for families and are often keeping an eye on elderly neighbours and other vulnerable people in our communities, are already exhausted and overworked. They feel desperate. Living costs are soaring and they can’t afford to put the heating on. Food banks have become a reality for many women who have recently lost their jobs. Vital local services are disappearing – afterschool clubs, homecare, day centres – at the same time as they will be forced away from loved ones by compulsory back-to-work schemes, and the housing benefit and overall benefit caps. The Bill will have life-threatening consequences, many more than hit the headlines.

I wanted to go, be with people like me, feel some strength through empathy and understanding.

I can't go though.

I have an appointment with Mind.

It was made for me, to help me fill in job application forms, I didn't make it myself.

I've a mind not to go. I'm sure they help lots of people, infact they do.

Pressure.

I want to curl up and pretend I'm a billionaire and that all human's have bad days and hey, look on the bright side, Cameron's going to scrap my 50p tax rate and make me richer.

Maybe I should blog about other things

Maybe I shouldn't blog at all

Desire

There is a flame that burns within me after all

Don't tell me what I can and cannot do.

What I should and should not do.

Leave me alone