"The Friends"

When the Foca came to get our son (3 hours late) yesterday I told him I had planned to give him a birthday card about 'friends' but after seven years, I had finally opened my eyes.

That whenever we seem to be getting on, he sabotages it by being cruel. So now, no more. I had finished with my desire to one day being friends with him.

He said not to talk about this infront of our son, I said I was going to talk about it no more, I'd said all I had to say on the matter.

Today I have received a court order from Brighton County Court asking me to appear on August 17th to sign the parental responsibility order.

That little piece of "paper" that he feels he's "failing as a father" without.

Has he forgotten that I am his son's mother? That I am awaiting a bailiff's order from the London County Court? That he was the first to hand us notice and render us homeless?

"How does this effect my rights as a father?" he'd said at the time.
"You don't have any," I'd answered.
"Yes I do."
"No you don't."
"Yes I do."
"No you don't, I thought you knew."

My son's in Ireland now with him. He'd asked if he could take him and I'd said 'sure, when do you want?'. Last two weeks of August he'd said. OK. Then he changed his mind and said now and I'd said 'OK'. Nice way to thank me don't you think?

The card I was foolishly going to give him before his text arrived last monday, was an Edward Monkton one. This was behind my rage on Monday. That I've been a total idiot believing in the guy.

"THE FRIENDS can connect in a mysterious way without even thinking.
Perhaps they have AMAZING MAGICAL POWERS.
Perhaps they are both just PECULIAR IN THE HEAD."

I'm positively peculiar. I've no idea what he is. We are not, we will never, be friends.

I let go of any creeping guilt about having posted about him this past year and a half.

I can't talk to my friends about him. Words simply fail me.