Materialising through Skype

Sinja originally called me on my mobile then discovered I had skype. I rarely use it, I don't know how. My mum calls me on it and I email chat to my friend in Canada.

When Sinja's voice came through my computer, it felt like she was in the room. I closed my eyes and she was. We chatted for 45 minutes, while her son played with friends.

Empathy. It's so powerful. She knows, she knows.

She said she didn't know how I was coping, she wouldn't be able to, she'd go under. "You're so strong Sue."

"Oh Sinja, so are you. Don't you remember?"

I told her that a couple of years ago, I sent her an email and I'd copied it down. I didn't read it to her but I had read it to myself:

Flip Sinja, so glad you didn't succeed and fate stepped in. You are so so so so special, and don't just take it from me [your son] thinks so too. I contemplated it last year, didn't try as my window doesn't open far and that was going to be my method, so there I stood infront of it, planning, planning everything and suddenly there was a powercut and in the dark I heard "mummy". I'd totally forgotten [my son] was there. I gave him a candlelit bath then later me the same with lavender oil. I was really shocked, numb as the whole thing dawned on me. The next day I thought I'd cook him his favourite meal, a labour intensive fish pie that I never bothered to do and I went out for cigarette and there in the sky were 2 rainbows.
I've been crawling up the banks ever since so I know exactly how you feel. Hang on girl, find a bit of gold and clutch on to it. [My son] is mine but anything Sinja, find anything. Don't leave [your son], don't leave me, don't leave this world. Oh and don't worry about calling!! Flip no. I live in a quiet night and no-one ever comes by here unexpectedly.
Sending my love and a big tight hug. Feel it Sinja, feel it xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

-Fucking facebook won't send it, just when it needs to Aaargh.
(December 2008 - copied in a diary so I wouldn't the lose the message to send it to her again)

My Danish friend has turned her life around. She is an incredible person. I've not had to surmount what she's had to surmount.

You know how you can feel really really lucky to know someone? That's how I feel about her. I feel it about quite a few of my friends.

It was lovely chatting to you Sinja, speak to you again soon and have a fabulous time in Canada! xxxxx