If I have made myself ill it is because the Government has made me ill.
I have tried not to allow it to get to me but it depresses me; makes me angry, gets me pissed off. I can only articulate it on here, it silences me in reality, renders me mute. "I don't like it when you're in your daydream head mummy," says my son. I may go to the Women's Centre and start articulating it there. I told them I'd pop by, when I met them at the lobby.
If I have made myself ill it is because of recurring evictions and a State that can but won't stop this cycle; won't regulate rents or build affordable homes. It's disgusting, disgusting what's going on. Private landlords aren't dropping rents and housing associations are increasing theirs. I know all this because the perk, if you like, of being in a need of housing situation, is that you have access to what social and council properties are available and for how much they are going for.
All this makes me ill.
A government who forces me out to work during a recession, when I have a job already. I'm a childminder, though paid less. Oh, doesn't my child count?
Is motherhood not valued anymore?
Is it a 'non job'?
Is that why lone parents aren't given social housing anymore, because they don't "work"?
This government has put me on ESA, with its damning policies and legislations.
Everytime I get better I get knocked down.
A nation of knocked down people.
I'm no different to a criminal forced to do community service - voluntary work by another name - internships - we won't pay you - and we'll take away the childcare so you have nowhere to outsource your primary occupation - ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa.
I love writing this shit.
I could keep writing it, keep writing it if it makes ONE PERSON THINK
I've got to stop thinking though. That's what's got me into my mess, well, according to Louise Hay, according to me.
Angry, pissed off, hurting, hurting hurting hurting
A nation of angry, pissed off, hurting people.
A generation of children living with angry, pissed off, hurting people, bounced from one home to another, overcrowded, cold, in debt.
I wanted to give you a happy ending. Oh! I can't!
"By the time people wake up, the damage will have been done," the Ed said to me.
Read all about it! Read all about it!!
I have to rest now, think of my son.
My son, my sun, my son
I'm blessed, that's the problem isn't it Prime Minister?