Having it out with the social worker

Last wednesday. All so long ago now but I feel I have to write it down.
Last wednesday my son's social worker came round.
I asked her why she'd told my doctor my child would be put on the child protection register if I turned down the flat and ended up in a hostel.
She said she didn't say that, so I said 'so my doctor's lying?'
"Well we have concerns.." she began to say.
"What concerns?" I think I spat it out, I was so angry.
"You tell your son everything that's happening," she said.
"You told me to!" I interrupted.
"No I didn't!" she countered.
"Yes you did. You came here asking him what he thought of his school and after he said he liked it, you told him to go into another room and told me to prepare him for leaving it!"
"Leaving the flat."
"No, leaving his school."
"You have so many issues," she said carrying on with the list of 'concerns'.
"No I don't!" I didn't yell but there was angry inflectives in my speech.
"Yes you do."
"No I don't. Housing, housing, housing is my only issue!"

I'm lucky she's nice. I'm lucky she can empathise with my situation because she's a single mother herself. I'm lucky we have an understanding.

I'm not lucky she wants to transfer me to another social worker team. That to me is far more dangerous. My son being given a child protection order because the new person doesn't not empathise or understand.

Do you want to hear something really fecking funny, something that could make a comedy circuit if expressed better than me?

Doc told me I shouldn't tell anyone I had suicidal thoughts, that's why the social services would put my son on the protection register.

I've met parents, you may or may not have read, who have had their children taken away from them.

Taken away so the parents can just finish themselves off?

It really sickens me. I do not stub out fags on my son's back. I do not kick him into touch.

But I'm under their bloody spotlight now, for bad parenting - not coping with the stress of evictions my symbolic husband has placed me under by not providing the housing so desperately, desperately needed, in my borough, in my country.

I'm onto it though. I'm doing what I can.