Advice I was given, gave, and had to take

"If you don't like the way your friends treat you, and they won't stop when you tell them you don't like it, you either accept it and let it continue, or you walk away."

My friend Mary gave this advice to her daughter who was having a hard time at school. She then gave it to me whose son was having a hard time at school.

My son didn't want to do it. "They're my friends mummy."
"I know but that's the choice you have to make," I replied, "I know it's hard." He actually did though, actually did it! More than that, it resolved whatever issue between himself and his friends.

I was so proud of him, I thought I'd tell my playground friends. It concerned their kids after all.

I've learnt my lesson.

Later I had to follow this advice myself. If my son could do it, so could I. Recently I've had to tell him.

"Why don't you talk to Ugly mummy?" (No, he doesn't know I call her that either)
"Well, remember I told you if you don't like how your friends treat you.......? Well, I didn't like how she treated me so I just walked away."

"What did she do?"

"Oh she just said I was this that and the other and I just had to do like you did, and walk away."

"What did she say?"

"Oh I can't really remember, just stuff, like I was negative and always talking about myself. She talked about herself too so it just made me cross."

This was enough for my son. It's not lying, it's not the truth either. I've forgiven her for that for she did me a favour in a way. My son though, I could never forgive any adult who projects their bile and insecurities onto him.