Citizen's Advice Bureau

There is usually quite a queue when I get to the Citizen's Advice Bureau following the school run but I was first in line when I got there which was a pleasant surprise. I quickly nipped next door for a double expresso as it didn't open for another hour.

When I came back out there was an old man in a mobility chair and as we began to chat I asked him if I could stand infront of him as I was going to smoke.

He was an Irish man, from the same town in Ireland as my son's great granny. He was there for help with his disability form. He has to fill a new one in every year. I didn't see the queue swell as we chatted. Every person with their own unique problems. Where will they all go as all these Bureaus are shut down, one by one, because of 'lack of funding'? The old man told me they were shutting down law centres too. There's nothing you can say really, or nothing I can at any rate.

The Citizen's Advice Bureau is a life line for people. It's been a life line for me on many occasion.

I was relieved to be second in the queue even though I'd bought my book with me (still on The Road... I can't seem to finish it) I have a lovely memory of reading Jane and the Dragon to my son years ago as we waited over an hour for our turn. Children are so good in there. They instinctively know not to give their parents any more shit on top of what they're already dealing with.

I got called up and showed the woman my 'Notice Requiring Possession'.

"I can't deal with this anymore," I tell her. "The part of my brain that deals with this has shut down. My entire brain is shutting down, every day now I ask my son what he wants to eat as I can't think of anything myself."

"That's good," she replies. "Children often choose things that are easy to cook."

"Not mine," I laugh. "I sometimes wish he'd ask for beans on toast but he'll go for fish pie or something but I have time to do it which is nice."

"You'll have to go to the law centre for this," she says. "It's a legal issue." She gives me a piece of paper with the phone number and opening times. There's a drop in tomorrow morning for those with housing issues. They haven't shut down that one yet then, thank God.

I thank her, say bye and good luck to the old man, then decide to cycle down to the surgery to make an appointment with my doctor. Next Monday at 12.40. Quite fortuitous I don't have 'a job'. In a month my son will be 7 and the Government will force me into one. Find an employer who will empathise with all the time off I'll have to take? I caught some of Channel 4's Benefit Busters - companies will take the Government (your) money, then fail to renew my contract after a month. I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

My son has asked for rice and lentils tonight. That's comfort food for me too so spot on kiddo!