The school will mediate!

My appointment with the Deputy Head this morning. I'm exhausted, what with the Boot Camp/Joseph experience yesterday so no fury when I talk about the Foca!

I tell her that the Foca says he is not bringing my son back on Sunday's anymore, that he wants to discuss this and that I do not want to discuss anything with him alone. I've seen posters outside the after school club saying the school can refer parents to support services. I need support!

The Foca will not listen, I tell her. This week alone my son has missed a swimming lesson because he was so tired on Monday. There were tantrums in the morning and tears in the afternoon on Tuesday, tears at after school club on Wednesday because he hurt his hand and then wasn't able to join the other kids to play Dodge Ball because there were already too many. I saved the day saying "We're late for Beavers!" where a child crashed into him accidently leaving a big bump on his head. Yesterday he was whiny, today was the first day that things are back to normal.

She told me my son was late to school on Monday and the Foca was 40 minutes late for a pre-arranged meeting with my son's class teacher.

"Do you think anyone can sit in with me?" I asked. "It's not that I can't talk to him, it's just that six years on, I know him very well and I want someone there. My son has a better chance of being heard."

"Well, we're not qualified to mediate, " she says which I understand. "But if you want me to sit in, I will."

"Will you? That would be great. I've received an email from him which I haven't opened. Can I tell him that you'll do that?"

"Yes, we have our reservations too."

"Thanks, thanks alot!"

"We have to look out for our little Joseph don't we!" she says smiling and I turn into a gooey loved up mamma right there in front of her!

I go to the coffee shop for a shot. I must open that email today. I must ignore what it says. I get home and BREATHE two fags worth and go to the toilet three times.

Thank goodness I didn't read it on Sunday. He tells me I've ignored all his points, blathers on about the Sunday journey being unfair on our son, two days of 'mild tiredness a month' being a 'small price' and the laughable comment: "I do not want you to come to Brighton."

I hit reply.

Re-read my email, I did not ignore your points.

In your text message you said we should meet to discuss this. I do not wish to meet you on my own, for you ignore everything I say.

Our son missed swimming on Monday because he was so tired. There have been tears and accidents all week due to tiredness.

I have spoken to his school. They have their own reservations. They said they would be happy to sit in with us as we discuss this. We must arrange a time as soon as possible.

In the future, if you could send any emails to me to my [other] account. I use that account for work related issues.

As I pop into my inbox to transpose my response to you, there is another waiting from him. Let's see if he has cc'd my other account shall we? Let's see what he says. (Nico Teen, I don't need you right now... Ok then, let me roll you up....)

Here is his email. I can't be bothered to transpose main points. Apologies for incredibly long post:

I am surprised that it has taken a week for (our son) to recover from getting out of bed exactly the same time as usual.

And therefore, I am extremely concerned that you being unfair to (our son) by manipulating him into believing that he is being treated in anyway differently from millions of children the world over who have to travel much much further to school by public transport everyday.

(Our son) is a healthy kid with bucket loads of energy - what you are claiming just does not seem plausible.

The next Monday l bring (our son) up to school and I'll also take him swimming at the end of the day so I can determine for myself his ability to cope.

(Our son) needs to spend time with his extended family. That is a very important part of his development. Especially as you mentioned that you are estranged from your own siblings and so (our son) does get to see those cousins as much as he would like.

Please arrange the school mediated conversation for after (our son) and my next Monday morning journey.

He has cc'd my other account. I am not going to reply to him (back and forth back and forth back and forth). I am going to phone the school, ask the deputy head if I can cc her and go from there.

I am annoyed about this. I wanted to post something about PUNCHING bags.

Are you as lucky as me? Is your child in a fantastic school? If you are going through what I am, I hope so, for your sake.